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作者︰shyungchongzeng 來源︰文章閱讀(du)網 時間︰2020-03-26 22:43 閱讀(du)︰

 Dear Daughter:
親愛的女兒
  As we drove off from Columbia, I wanted to write a letter to you to tell you all that is on my mind.

當我們(men)開車駛出哥倫(lun)比(bi)亞大學的時候,我想寫一封信給你,告訴你盤(pan)旋在(zai)我腦中的想法。

  First, I want to tell you how proud we are. Getting into Columbia is a real testament of what a great well-rounded student you are. Your academic, artistic, and social skills have truly blossomed in the last few years. Whether it is getting the highest grade in Calculus, completing your elegant fashion design, successfully selling your painted running shoes, or becoming one of the top orators in Model United Nations, you have become a talented and accomplished young woman. You should be as proud of yourself as we are.

首先,我想告訴你我們(men)為你感到特別驕傲。進入哥倫(lun)比(bi)亞大學證(zheng)明你是(shi)一個全面發展的優秀學生(sheng),你的學業、藝術和社交技能(neng)最(zui)近(jin)都(du)有卓(zhuo)越的表現(xian),無論是(shi)你在(zai)微積分上得了最(zui)高分,完成自己典雅的時尚(shang)的設(she)計,成功(gong)賣出繪制(zhi)的跑鞋,還是(shi)在(zai)“模擬聯合國”演說中成為表現(xian)最(zui)突出的人之一,你毫無疑問已(yi)經是(shi)一個多才多藝的女孩(hai)。你的父母為你感到驕傲,你也應該像(xiang)我們(men)一樣為自己感到自豪。

  I will always remember the first moment I held you in my arms. I felt a tingling sensation that directly touched my heart. It was an intoxicating feeling I will always have. It must be that "father-daughter connection" which will bind us for life. I will always remember singing you lullaby while I rocked you to sleep. When I put you down, it was always with both relief (she finally fell asleep!) and regret (wishing I could hold you longer). And I will always remember taking you to the playground, and watching you having so much fun. You were so cute and adorable, and that is why everybody loved you so.

我會永(yong)遠du)塹玫諞淮ci)將你抱在(zai)臂(bi)彎的那一刻,一種新鮮(xian)激動的感覺瞬間觸動了我的心,那是(shi)一種永(yong)遠讓meng)姨兆淼母芯  褪shi)那種將我們(men)的一生(sheng)都(du)聯結在(zai)一起的“父女情結”。我也常常想起我ye) 糯咼 qu)輕搖你入睡,當我把(ba)你放(fang)下的時候,常常覺得既解脫又惋(wan)惜,一方(fang)面我想,她終(zhong)于睡著了!另一方(fang)面,我又多麼希望(wang)自己可(ke)以多抱你一會兒。我還記(ji)得帶(dai)你到運動場,看著你玩得那麼開心,你是(shi)那樣可(ke)愛,所(suo)有人都(du)非常愛你。

  You have been a great kid ever since you were born, always quiet, empathetic, attentive, and well-mannered. You were three when we built our house. I remember you quietly followed us every weekend for more than ten hours a day to get building supplies. You put up with that boring period without a fuss, happily ate hamburgers every meal in the car, sang with Barney until you fell asleep. When you went to Sunday Chinese school, you studied hard even though it was no fun for you. I cannot believe how lucky we are as parents to have a daughter like you.

你不(bu)但長(chang)得可(ke)愛,而且是(shi)個特別乖(guai)巧的孩(hai)子。你從不(bu)吵鬧、為人著想,既听話又有禮貌。當你三歲我們(men)建(jian)房子的時候,每個周末十多個小時你都(du)靜(jing)靜(jing)地跟著我們(men)去運建(jian)築材料(liao),三餐(can)在(zai)車上吃著漢堡,唱著兒歌(ge),唱累了就睡覺,一點(dian)都(du)不(bu)嬌氣不(bu)抱怨。你去上xian)莧盞鬧形難 鞍嗍保 」芤壞dian)也不(bu)覺得有趣,卻依然很努力。我們(men)做(zuo)父母的能(neng)有像(xiang)你這樣的女兒真的感到非常幸運

  You have been an excellent elder sister. Even though you two had your share of fights, the last few years you have become best friends. Your sister loves you so much, and she loves to make you laugh. She looks up to you, and sees you as her role model. As you saw when we departed, she misses you so much. And I know that you miss her just as much. There is nothing like family, and other than your parents, your sister is the one person who you can trust and confide in. She will be the one to take care of you, and the one you must take care of. There is nothing we wish more than that your sisterhood will continue to bond as you grow older, and that you will take care of each other throughout your lives. For the next four years, do have a short video chat with her every few days, and do email her when you have a chance.

你也是(shi)個很好的姐姐。雖然你們(men)姐妹以前(qian)也bu)崠蚣埽  shi)長(chang)大後(hou),你們(men)真的成為了好朋友妹妹很愛你,很喜bu)/A>逗你笑,她把(ba)你當成shang)陌bang)樣看待(dai)。我們(men)開車離開哥大後(hou),她非常想你,我知道(dao)你也很想她。世(shi)界上最(zui)寶貴的就是(shi)家(jia)人。和父母一樣,妹妹就是(shi)你最(zui)可(ke)以信任(ren)的人。隨著年齡(ling)的增長(chang),你們(men)姐妹之間的情誼(yi)不(bu)變(bian),你們(men)互相(xiang)照應,彼此(ci)關心,這就是(shi)我最(zui)希望(wang)見到的事情了。在(zai)你的大學四(si)年,有空時你一定(ding)要常常跟妹妹視頻聊聊天,寫寫chui)繾佑始

  College will be the most important years in your life. It is in college that you will truly discover what learning is about. You often question "what good is this course". I encourage you to be inquisitive, but I also want to tell you: "Education is what you have left after all that is taught is forgotten." What I mean by that is the materials taught isn't as important as you gaining the ability to learn a new subject, and the ability to analyze a new problem. That is really what learning in college is about this will be the period where you go from teacher-taught to master-inspired, after which you must become self-learner. So do take each subject seriously, and even if what you learn isn't critical for your life, the skills of learning will be something you cherish forever.

大學將是(shi)你人生(sheng)最(zui)重要的時光,在(zai)大學里(li)你會發現(xian)學習的真諦。你以前(qian)經常會問到 “這個課程(cheng)有什麼用”,這是(shi)個好meng)侍猓  shi)我希望(wang)你理解︰“教育的真諦就是(shi)當你忘記(ji)一切所(suo)學到的東西之後(hou)所(suo)剩下的東西。”我的意思是(shi),最(zui)重要的不(bu)是(shi)你學到的具體的知識,而是(shi)你學習新事物和解決新問題的能(neng)力。這才是(shi)大學學習的真正意義——這將是(shi)你從被動學習轉向自主(zhu)學習的階段,之後(hou)你會變(bian)成一個很好的自學者。所(suo)以,即便你所(suo)學的不(bu)是(shi)生(sheng)活里(li)所(suo)急需的,也要認真看待(dai)大學里(li)的每一門功(gong)課,就算(suan)學習的技能(neng)你會忘記(ji),學習的能(neng)力是(shi)你將受用終(zhong)身的。

  Do not fall into the trap of dogma. There is no single simple answer to any question. Remember during your high school debate class, I always asked you to take on the side that you don't believe in? I did that for a reason -- things rarely "black and white", and there are always many ways to look at a problem. You will become a better problem solver if you recognized that. This is called "critical thinking", and it is the most important thinking skill you need for your life. This also means you need to become tolerant and supportive of others. I will always remember when I went to my Ph.D. advisor and proposed a new thesis topic. He said "I don't agree with you, but I'll support you." After the years, I have learned this isn't just flexibility, it is encouragement of critical thinking, and an empowering style of leadership, and it has become a part of me. I hope it will become a part of you too.

不(bu)要被教條所(suo)束縛(fu),任(ren)何問題都(du)沒(mei)有一個唯(wei)一的簡單的答案。還記(ji)得當我幫助你高中的辯(bian)論課程(cheng)時,我總是(shi)讓你站在(zai)你不(bu)認可(ke)的那一方(fang)來辯(bian)論嗎?我這麼做(zuo)的理由就是(shi)希望(wang)你能(neng)夠(gou)理解︰看待(dai)一個問題不(bu)應該非黑即白,而是(shi)有很多方(fang)法和角度。當你意識到這點(dian)的時候,你就會成為一個很好的解決問題者。這就是(shi)“批判的思維”——你的一生(sheng)都(du)會需要的最(zui)重要的思考方(fang)式,這也意味著你還需要包容和支持不(bu)同(tong)于你的其他觀點(dian)。我永(yong)遠du)塹夢(meng)胰?椅業牟┤康際shi)提出了一個新論題,他告訴我︰“我不(bu)同(tong)意你,但我支持你。”多年後(hou),我認xian)兜秸獠bu)僅僅是(shi)包容,而是(shi)一種批判式思考,更是(shi)令人折服(fu)的領導風格,現(xian)在(zai)這也變(bian)成了我的一部分。我希望(wang)這也能(neng)成為你的一部分。

  Follow your passion in college. Take courses you think you will enjoy. Don't be trapped in what others think or say. Steve Jobs says when you are in college, your passion will create many dots, and later in your life you will connect them. In his great speech given at Stanford commencement, he gave the great example where he took calligraphy, and a decade later, it became the basis of the beautiful Macintosh fonts, which later ignited desktop publishing, and brought wonderful tools like Microsoft Word to our lives. His expedition into calligraphy was a dot, and the Macintosh became the connecting line. So don't worry too much about what job you will have, and don't be too utilitarian, and if you like Japanese or Korean, go for it, even if your dad thinks "it's not useful" : ) Enjoy picking your dots, and be assured one day you will find your calling, and connect a beautiful curve through the dots.

在(zai)大學里(li)你要追隨自己的激情和興趣,選(xuan)你感興趣的課程(cheng),不(bu)要困擾于別人怎麼ci)禱蛟趺聰搿Jshi)蒂(di)夫•喬(qiao)布斯guai) 倒guo),在(zai)大學里(li)你的熱(re)情會創造出很多點(dian),在(zai)你隨後(hou)的生(sheng)命中你會把(ba)這些(xie)點(dian)串聯起來chu)Tzai)他著名的斯坦福畢業典禮演講中,他舉(ju)了一個很好的例(li)子︰他在(zai)大學里(li)修了看ci)坪廖抻麼Φ氖櫸   旰hou),這成了隻(ping)果Macintosh里(li)漂(piao)亮字庫的基(ji)礎(chu),而因為Macintosh有這麼好的字庫,才帶(dai)來了桌面出版和今天的辦公軟件(例(li)如(ru)微軟Office)。他對書法的探索(suo)就是(shi)一個點(dian),而隻(ping)果Macintosh把(ba)多個點(dian)聯結成了一條線。所(suo)以不(bu)要太擔心將來你要做(zuo)什麼樣的工作,也不(bu)要太急功(gong)近(jin)利。假如(ru)你喜bu)度沼 蠔 錚 腿??桑 詞鼓A href="http://www.duwenzhang.com/huati/fuqin/index1.html">爸爸曾認為那沒(mei)什麼用︰)盡興地選(xuan)擇你的點(dian)吧,要有信念(nian)有一天機緣(yuan)來臨時,你會找到自己的人生(sheng)使命,畫出一條美麗的曲(qu)線。

  Do your best in classes, but don't let pressure get to you. Your mother and I have no expectations for your grades. If you graduate and learn something in your four years, we would feel happy. Your Columbia degree will take you far, even if you don't graduate with honors. So please don't give yourself pressure. During your last few months in high school, you were so happy because there was little pressure and college applications are finished. But in the past few weeks, we saw you are beginning to worry (did you know you bite your nails when you are nervous?). Please don't be worried. The only thing that matters is that you learned. The only metric you should use is that you tried. Grades are just silly letters that give the vain people something to brag, and the lazy people something to fear. You are too good to be either.

在(zai)功(gong)課上要盡力,但不(bu)要給自己太多壓力。你媽媽和我在(zai)成績上對你沒(mei)什麼要求,只要你能(neng)順(shun)利畢業並在(zai)這四(si)年里(li)學到了些(xie)東西,我們(men)就會很高興了。即便你畢業時沒(mei)有獲得優異的成績,你的哥倫(lun)比(bi)亞學位也將帶(dai)你走得很遠。所(suo)以yuan)鷥約貉沽ΑTzai)你高中生(sheng)活的最(zui)後(hou)幾個月,因為壓力比(bi)較小,大學申(shen)請也結束了,你過(guo)得很開心,但是(shi)在(zai)最(zui)近(jin)的幾個星期,你好像(xiang)開始緊張起來chu)# 闋zhu)意到你緊張時會咬指(zhi)甲嗎?)千萬別擔心,最(zui)重要的是(shi)你在(zai)學習,你需要的唯(wei)一衡量(liang)是(shi)你的努力程(cheng)度。成績只不(bu)過(guo)是(shi)虛榮的人用以吹(chui)噓和慵懶(lan)的人所(suo)恐(kong)懼的無聊數(shu)字而已(yi),而你既不(bu)虛榮也不(bu)慵懶(lan)。

  Most importantly, make friends and be happy. College friends are often the best in life, because during college you are closer to them physically than to your family. Also, going through independence and adulthood is a natural bonding experience. Pick a few friends and become really close to them pick the ones who are genuine and sincere to you. Don't worry about their hobbies, grades, looks, or even personalities. You have developed some real friendships in high school in your last two years, so trust your instinct, and make new friends. You are a genuine and sincere person anyone would enjoy being your friend, so be confident, outgoing, and pro-active. If you think you like someone, tell her. You have very little to lose. Give people the benefit of the doubt; don't stereotype and be forgiving. People are not perfect, so as long as they are genuine and sincere, trust them and be good to them. They will give back. This is my secret of success that I am genuine with people and trust them (unless they do something to lose my trust). Some people tell me that occasionally I would be taken advantage of. They are right, but I can tell you that that loss is nothing compared to what I gained. In my last 18 years leading people, I have realized that only one thing matters to gain the trust and respect of others, and to do so, you need to trust and respect others first. Whether it is for management, work, or friendship, this is something you should ponder.

最(zui)重要的是(shi)在(zai)大學里(li)你要交一些(xie)朋友,快樂生(sheng)活。大學的朋友往往是(shi)生(sheng)命中最(zui)好的朋友,因為在(zai)大學里(li)你和朋友能(neng)夠(gou)近(jin)距離交往。另外,在(zai)一塊兒成長(chang),一起獨lan)  蘢勻壞嗇忝men)就會緊緊地系在(zai)一起,成為密(mi)友xuan)D閿Ω錳粞xuan)一些(xie)真誠誠懇的朋友,跟他們(men)qiao)捉jin),別在(zai)乎他們(men)的愛好、成績、外表甚至性格。你在(zai)高中的最(zui)後(hou)兩年已(yi)經交到了一些(xie)真正的朋友,所(suo)以盡可(ke)以相(xiang)信自己的直(zhi)覺,再交一些(xie)新朋友吧。你是(shi)一個真誠的人,任(ren)何人都(du)會喜bu)陡闋zuo)朋友的,所(suo)以要自信、外向、主(zhu)動一點(dian),如(ru)果你喜bu)賭橙耍 透嫠咚 退suan)她拒(ju)絕(jue)了,你也沒(mei)有損失什麼chu)R宰zui)大的善(shan)意去對人,不(bu)要有成見,要寬容。人無完人,只要他們(men)很真誠,就信任(ren)他們(men),對他們(men)友善(shan)。他們(men)將給你相(xiang)同(tong)的回報,這是(shi)我ye)曬gong)的秘密(mi)——我以誠待(dai)人,信任(ren)他人(除非他們(men)做(zuo)了失信于我的事)。有人告訴這樣有時我會被佔便宜,他們(men)是(shi)對yuan)模  shi)我可(ke)以告訴你︰以誠待(dai)人讓meng)業玫降腦對凍 guo)我失去的。在(zai)我做(zuo)管理的18年里(li),我yi)?揭患苤匾 氖隆   氳玫剿說男湃ren)和尊(zun)重,只有先re)?湃ren)和尊(zun)重他人。無論是(shi)管理、工作、交友,這點(dian)都(du)值得你參考。

  Do keep your high school friends, and stay connected to them, but do not use them as substitutes for college friendship, and do not spend too much time with them, because that would eat into your time to make new friends.

要和你高中時代(dai)的朋友保持聯系,但是(shi)不(bu)要用他們(men)來取代(dai)大學的友誼(yi),也不(bu)要把(ba)全部的時間都(du)花在(zai)老朋友身上,因為那樣你就會失去交新朋友的機會了。

  Start planning for your summers early what would you like to do? Where would you like to live? What would you like to learn? What have you learned in college that might change your mind? I think your plan of studying fashion is good, and you should decide where you want to be, and get into the right courses. We of course hope you come back to Beijing, but you should go where you think is best for you.

你還要早點(dian)開始規劃你的暑假——你想做(zuo)什麼?你想呆在(zai)哪兒?你想學點(dian)什麼?你在(zai)大學里(li)學習是(shi)否(fu)會讓你有新的打算(suan)?我覺得你學習藝術設(she)計的計ping) 懿bu)錯,你應該想好你該去哪兒學習相(xiang)應的課程(cheng)。我們(men)當bi)幌Mwang)你回到北京(jing),但是(shi)最(zui)終(zhong)的決定(ding)是(shi)你的。

  Whether it is summer-planning, or coursework planning, or picking a major, or managing your time, you should take control of your life. In the past, I have helped you quite a bit, whether it is in college application, designing your extracurricular activities, or picking the initial coursework. I will always be there for you, but the time has come for you to be in the driver's seat this is your life, and you need to be in control. I will always remember the exhilarating feeling in my life that I got to decide to skip kindergarten, that I got to decide to change to computer science major, that I got to decide to leave academia for Apple, that I got to decide to go to China, that I got to decide to go to Google, and most recently, that I got to decide to start my own business. Being able to decide means you get to live the life that you want to. Life is too short to live the life others do or others want you. Being in control feels great. Try it, and you'll love it!

不(bu)管是(shi)暑假計ping)  gong)課規劃,抑或是(shi)選(xuan)專業,管理時間,你都(du)應該負責你的人生(sheng)。過(guo)去不(bu)管是(shi)申(shen)請學校、設(she)計課外活動或者選(xuan)擇最(zui)初的課程(cheng),我都(du)從旁(pang)幫助了si)悴bu)少(shao)。以後(hou),我仍然會一直(zhi)站你身旁(pang),但是(shi)現(xian)在(zai)是(shi)你自己掌舵的時候了。我ye)3<ji)起我生(sheng)命中那些(xie)令人振奮的時刻——在(zai)幼兒園決定(ding)跳級,決定(ding)轉到計算(suan)機科學專業,決定(ding)離開學術界選(xuan)擇Apple,決定(ding)回中國,決定(ding)選(xuan)擇Google,乃至最(zui)近(jin)選(xuan)擇創辦我的新公司。有能(neng)力進行選(xuan)擇意味著你會過(guo)上自己想要的生(sheng)活。生(sheng)命太短暫了,你不(bu)能(neng)過(guo)別人想要你過(guo)的生(sheng)活。掌控自己的生(sheng)命是(shi)很棒(bang)的感覺,試試吧,你會愛上它的!

  I told your mom I'm writing this letter, and asked what she wanted me to say. She thought and said: "just ask her to take care of herself." Simple but deeply caring that is how your mother is, and that is why you love her so much. In this simple sentence is her hope that you will become independent in the way you take care of yourself that you will remember to take your medicine, that you will get enough sleep, that you will have a balanced diet, that you will get some exercise, and that you will go see a doctor whenever you don't feel good. An ancient Chinese proverb says that the most important thing to be nice to your parents is to take care of yourself. This is because your parents love you so much, and that if you are well, they will have comfort. You will understand this one day when you become a mother. But in the meantime, please listen to your mother and take care of yourself.

我告訴你媽媽我在(zai)寫這封信,問她有什麼想對你說的,她想了想,說“讓她好好照顧自己”,很簡單卻飽(bao)含著真切的關心——這一向是(shi)你深愛的媽媽的特點(dian)。這短短的一句話,是(shi)她想提醒你很多事情,比(bi)re)ru)要記(ji)得自己按時吃藥,好好睡覺,保持健康的飲食(shi),適量(liang)運動,不(bu)舒(shu)服(fu)的時候要去看醫生(sheng)等(deng)等(deng)。中國有句古語,說“身體發膚,受之父母,不(bu)敢毀傷(shang),孝(xiao)之始jia)病薄U餼浠暗囊饉加帽bi)較新的方(fang)法詮釋就是(shi)說︰父母最(zui)愛的就是(shi)你,所(suo)以照顧好自己就是(shi)孝(xiao)順(shun)最(zui)好的方(fang)法。當你成為母親的那天,你就會理解這些(xie)。在(zai)那天之前(qian),听媽媽的,你一定(ding)要好好照顧自己。

  College is the four years where you have:

  •the greatest amount of free time

大學是(shi)你自由時間最(zui)多的四(si)年。

  •the first chance to be independent

大學是(shi)你第一次(ci)學會獨lan) 乃si)年。

  •the most flexibility to change

大學是(shi)可(ke)塑性最(zui)強(qiang)的四(si)年。

  •the lowest risk for making mistakes

大學是(shi)犯(fan)錯代(dai)價最(zui)低的四(si)年。

  So please treasure your college years make the best of your free time, become an independent thinker in control of your destiny, evolve yourself into a bi-cultural talent, be bold to experiment, learn and grow through your successes and challenges.

所(suo)以,珍惜你的大學時光吧,好好利用你的空閑時間,成為掌握自己命運的獨lan)?伎頰擼  棺約旱畝   拍neng),大膽地去嘗試,通(tong)過(guo)不(bu)斷的成功(gong)和挑戰(zhan)來學習和成長(chang),成為融匯中西的人才。

  When I faced the greatest challenge and opportunity in my life in 2005, you gave me a big hug and said "bonne chance", which means "good luck" and "good courage". Now I do the same for you. Bonne chance, my angel and princess. May Columbia become the happiest four years in your life, and may you blossom into just what you dream to be.

當我在(zai)2005年面對人生(sheng)最(zui)大的挑戰(zhan)時,你給了我大大的擁抱,還跟我說了一句法語“bonne chance”。這句話代(dai)表“祝你勇敢,祝你好運!”現(xian)在(zai),我也想跟你說同(tong)樣的話,bonne chance,我的天使和公主(zhu),希望(wang)哥倫(lun)比(bi)亞成為你一生(sheng)中最(zui)快樂的四(si)年,希望(wang)你成為你夢(meng)想成為的人!

      Love,
      愛你的,

      Dad (& Mom)

      爸爸(和媽媽)


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